Missing Peace: Help! These People are Driving Me Crazy
MESSAGE TRANSCRIPTION:
My name is Brandon. I am our student pastor here. Super excited to be with you guys this morning, and I’m super energized and pumped up because of this past weekend with Winter Wonderland. There was a bunch of amazing things that happened and Pastor Virgil at the end of the service is going to update you guys. But this morning, I want to just lead off with asking a question because I’m curious: By the show of hands, how many of you would say right now you have someone in your life who is difficult to love? Raise your hand. You have someone in your life who’s difficult to love. I see some wives pointing at their husbands, please don’t do that. All right? Just want you to raise your hand. But I think it’s incredibly interesting that especially around the holidays, we tend to find more people who are difficult to love than we can find people that we actually love.
Alright? And some of you, you’re already challenging me. I can see it in your face. You would say: “Well, Brandon, that’s not true at all. Because the truth of the matter is, I didn’t like them all year long.” Alright? I didn’t like them all year long, but now it’s even worse because I have to spend the holidays with them. I had a Thanksgiving meal, now I have to do Christmas. I have to buy them a gift. Two times a year is just too often for someone who is hard to love. We all have people in our lives who are hard to love, and the holiday season tends to bring it more to life. It was Amy Morin, she’s a therapist and mental health specialist. This is what she said about families around the holidays. She said:
“It shouldn’t surprise anyone that 69% of Americans come into conflict with loved ones during the holidays. Family members are often the people we know best and who know us best. A large family dynamic can be an intricate web of personality clashes, complicated histories, old grudges, and differences in opinions.”
Amy Morin (Mental Health Specialist)
And I already see a lot of nodding heads and smiling faces because you know exactly what I’m talking about. See, what Amy is saying is a lot of people come to the table with different ideas and differences of opinions, and those people in your family probably made you mad last year. So this year, you are locked and loaded and you’re ready to unleash on them and tell them why they’re wrong and why they’re an idiot. In Jesus’ name, amen. Amen. Amen. Yeah. You guys know exactly what I’m talking about, but it’s not only family that’s difficult to love, right? Some of you, you chose to brave about a couple weeks ago and go Black Friday shopping. And all those people who cut you off and hit your cart, they were extremely difficult to love.
I think about the workplace. You have a lot of people that you work with who maybe get under your skin or make you feel less than what you are and they’re difficult to love. It was the people who cut you off in traffic on your way to church this morning and you had a few choice words or signs to show them, right? There’s so many people that are difficult to love, and I don’t know if you know this, but it’s not getting any better. It’s not getting any better. People right now, they’re quick to become angry, they’re quick to judge, they’re quick to call foul. They’re extremely quick to be offended. People who are extremely quick to be offended, they often say: “You’ve hurt me. You’ve gone too far. You’ve wronged me because you’ve stepped on my toes. I’m going to cancel you.”
People are extremely easily to become offended. And what I’ve noticed:
If you’re on a continual search to be offended, you will always find what you’re looking for.
If you’re on a continual search to be offended, to be hurt, to get angry, to get upset, to feel betrayed, you’ll always find what you’re looking for. And the reality is there’s absolutely no win whatsoever in living an offended life. See, I’ve never heard anyone say: “My life is so much better because I am pissed off everywhere I go.” I’ve never heard anyone say that. I’ve never heard anyone say: “My life is so much better because I’m angry and I find fault in every situation.” See, what we have to realize is that people right now, they’re hurting more than ever. What we have to understand is people are on edge more than ever. So of course they’re going to hurt us. Of course they’re going to offend us.
We need to recognize that being offended is inevitable, but living offended is a choice.
Being offended is inevitable. People will offend you. It is inevitable that you will be cut off in traffic. It is inevitable that sometime at some point, someone will say something rude to you. It’s inevitable that someday your kids may say something hurtful to you. It’s inevitable that people at work are going to get under your skin. It’s inevitable that you will be offended. But living offended is a choice. It’s a choice and it’s a choice. And I want you to know what I want you to have this morning, Eastside. What I want you to have is:
I want you to be able to live at peace.
I want you to be able to live at peace. I want to help you live an unoffended life and live at peace with others because that’s what I believe God has called us to this morning. And so we find ourselves today in a sermon series called:
“Missing Peace.”
And the title of today’s message is called:
“Help! These people are driving me crazy.”
Alright? So with that, today we’re going to seek God for some true peace from Jesus, who is our peace. And so before we continue, I just want you to pray with me. So Father, we come to you right now and we ask you to do what only you can do. God, we ask that you would just do a work in our hearts. Open us up. Let us be ready to receive what you have for us. And God, help us understand that being offended is inevitable, but living offended is a choice in God. So help us make the right choice this morning. And Jesus, we pray this in your name. Amen and amen.
So Eastside, if you’re ready this morning, I want you to say, I’m ready. Are you ready? Man, that was really good. That was way better than 9:30. So I’m excited. So we’re going to dive in. Romans 12, 14 through 18, easy to read, incredibly difficult to live out, easy to read, incredibly difficult to live out. But Paul is going to tell us, if you have anyone in your life who’s a little bit difficult to love, this is what you need to remember. Pick it up in verse 14. He says: “Bless those who persecute you, bless and do not curse…”
Incredibly easy to read but extremely difficult to live out. Amen.
“Bless those who persecute you, but rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
Romans 12:14-18
Live at peace with everyone. And what I want to do is I just want to start off at the beginning with what Paul says. Paul says: “Bless those…” Someone say, bless. “Bless those who persecute you.” We could say, bless those who are rude to you. Bless those who are difficult. Bless those who betray you. Bless those who are mean to you. Paul says:
“Bless those who persecute you.”
Romans 12:14
And so what does it mean to bless when we see that in scripture? What does it mean to bless? Well, the word blessed comes from the Greek word, Eli Gao. And it simply means: a very good word or to speak well of or to which the very blessed blessings for someone in your life.
And so what Paul is saying is: “I want you to live like this.” He’s saying: “Speak well of or wish the best blessings for someone who is difficult to be around. Speak well of and wish the very best blessings for someone who is rude to you, to someone who offends you.” He says: “Bless those who persecute you.” Now, I don’t know about you, but it is really easy for me to want to bless you if I like you. It’s the rest of you that make it extremely difficult for me to want to bless you. Amen. Some of you know exactly what I’m talking about. It’s easy to be a blessing to those who are a blessing. It’s easy to be nice to those who are nice. It’s easy to be generous to those who are generous, but it’s incredibly difficult to bless someone who offends you.
It’s incredibly difficult to be a blessing to someone who is harsh to you, who belittles you, who leaves you out, who hurts your feelings, who betrayed you. And the reality is:
It’s hard to be a blessing to those who offend us.
In fact, I hate even saying this from the stage, but there is a small sick part of me that when someone I don’t like or someone I don’t trust or someone that I have a hard time being around, there’s a small part of me that likes when something bad happens to them. And some of you, you’re like: “I have no clue what you’re talking about.” And I just want to say you can go ahead and polish your halo. Alright? We know you’re better than everyone else. We love you. We’re going to pray for you. You’re not telling the truth. But there’s a small part of me that when I’m driving down the interstate, and there’s a guy riding my tail and he slings around going 90 miles an hour, there’s a small part of me that loves, he didn’t see the cop that was in front of me, right?
Josh? Josh pulled him over. There’s a small part of me that loves that. I love it so much that I slowed down and I rolled down my window, and I make sure I can give ’em my one line sermon and I yell: “You reap what you sow, you idiot.” I mean some of you know exactly what I’m talking about, but yet in the Greek language we see Paul’s command and Paul’s command is a present imperative. See, when you see a present imperative within the scripture, what it means:
You are supposed to do what you are told and to keep on doing it.
It’s not a one-time fix. It’s not only for that time when Paul was saying it, but Paul is very literally saying: “Bless those who persecute you.” And it could be translated this way:
“Be a continual blessing to those who are continual problem.”
Be a continual blessing to those who are a continual problem, be a continual blessing. And I don’t know about you, I can be a blessing to someone who’s difficult to be around for like a good solid five seconds. I got five seconds in me, maybe even a minute. But if they are a continual burden, they are continually hard to be around, it’s extremely hard for me not to get offended. Eventually, eventually I want to snap and I want to retaliate. I don’t want to be a blessing to someone who is mean to me. But yet we see Paul, he gives us this imperative inspired by the Holy Spirit that we are to be a blessing, a continual blessing to those who are a continual problem. And so the question I ask myself as God has taught me this over time is: How in the world do you do that? How in the world do you be a continual blessing to those who are a continual problem? How can we choose to do and respond as God has called us? And the answer is:
We have to choose. It’s on us. We have to choose to live an unoffended life.
We have to choose to live the unoffended life. We get to choose how we respond and how we act towards people once they offend us. Because being offended is inevitable, but living offended is a choice. And today, Paul is going to teach us three things to help us live the unoffended life. He’s going to teach us three things to help us be a continual blessing to those who are a continual problem. And so if you’re taking notes this morning, the first thing that we need to remember is:
We need to remember the mercies of God in your life.
We have to remember the mercy of God in our life. And what I want to do is actually want to go back to the first verse in chapter 12. And Paul is going to start off by saying this. He’s going to say:
“Therefore, brothers and sisters, in view of the mercies of God”
Romans 12:1
Someone say God’s mercy. God’s mercy. And I just want to ask, how merciful has God been to you? How good has God been to you? How much has God forgiven you when you didn’t deserve it? How much has God blessed you beyond what you should have received? See, when you think about all that God has granted you, when you think about all that God has done to forgive you, when you think about how much we don’t deserve his mercy and his grace, it’s easier to live the unoffended life. I mean, maybe have you asked this question: How much and how often have we been that difficult person to love in our relationship with God? How often have we ran the other direction?
How often have we turned away from God when he’s called us to something better, something sweeter. And I would say it’s all the time, but yet, God is chosen to love us anyway and to extend his mercy. And so what I want you to remember this morning is that when someone steps on your toes, when someone is rude to you, when someone is mean to you, when someone gets under your skin, you need to remember how much mercy you’ve been given from God because then it becomes easier and easier and easier to extend mercy to those who are hard to love. The second thing you have to remember for living the unoffended life is:
You have to be a living sacrifice.
You have to be a living sacrifice. Speaking back up in verse one, it says this:
“Therefore, brothers and sisters, I urge you in view of God’s mercies to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God. This is your true and proper worship.”
Romans 12:1 (CSB)
To be a living sacrifice. And see, I love this because if you want to worship God, it’s not just singing a song. It’s not just serving in the church and all that’s a part of it, but it’s actually living your life for God. It’s actually loving people as we have been loved. That is a spiritual act of worship. And how do we do this? How are we to be a living sacrifice? Because when I think of this, this sounds like a contradiction of terms, doesn’t it, Josh? I mean, living sacrifice. See, when I think of sacrifices, I think of a dead sacrifice. But Paul says, we are to be a living sacrifice. And so when I think of a living sacrifice, I think of the lamb of God. I think of Jesus who said that: “I am willing to die.”
I’m willing to die. I’m willing to be a living sacrifice. And he says: “No one takes my life. I lay it down.” I lay it down. So how are we to be a living sacrifice? We have to fully surrender to God. You have to fully surrender your own selfish desires. You have to lay your desires down and we have to die to ourselves so that Christ can live through us. It was Paul who said this in Galatians 2:20. He says:
“I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless, I live; yet not I, but Christ lives in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh by the faith of the son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.”
Galatians 2:20 (KJV)
Paul is saying we have been crucified with Christ and that it’s no longer us who live, but it’s Christ who lives in us. If we want to be a living sacrifice, we have to fully surrender to the desires of God. We have to fully trust that the people who rung us, that God will get revenge on our behalf because it doesn’t belong to us. We have to fully allow ourselves, allow our lives to be worshiped by laying down our lives and allowing Christ to live in us. If we want to live the unoffended life, we have to remember how merciful God has been. You have to be a living sacrifice. And the last thing you have to remember is:
Do not be proud and do not be conceited.
It goes on in Romans chapter 12, verse 16. It says:
“Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low positions. Do not be conceited.”
Romans 12:16
Do not be proud and do not be conceited. Do not be proud. Do not be conceited. I’m going to say it one more time because some of you think I’m saying it to the person next to you, but I’m saying it to you, okay? Do not be proud and do not be conceited. And it’s pretty crazy because when you look at the Greek language, it translates into this, are you ready? It translates into this. It means “Do not be proud and do not be conceited.” And I don’t know if you know this or not, but in our world right now, there’s a lot of proud and conceited people. I mean, they’re absolutely everywhere. Everywhere. There’s people in the church who are proud and conceited in Jesus’ name. They’re always right about everything. I’m right about this. I’m right about that. I’m proud. I know it all. Guess what? I watch four YouTube videos and I listened to a very biased podcast and I have a friend who used to work for the government who says that I’m right, so I’m right and everybody else is wrong.
And I want you to know something. If you believe you’re always right, you will always be offended when someone disagrees with you. And so I want you to hear this, listen right person. Jesus didn’t tell us to be right. Jesus told us to be loving. Jesus told us to be loving. He didn’t say the world would know us by how correct we are. He said they would know us by how loving we are. And this makes me think of a time several years ago now when I worked in a warehouse, and it was in this warehouse that I learned how much people did not care about how much you knew. And when I was going here, I had this belief that because I’m telling the truth, because I’m talking about the Bible, because I’m talking about Jesus, because I’m sharing truth and giving information that could potentially change their life, I was being loving.
But I quickly learned that I was doing it out of the wrong posture the entire time. And I would walk around and I had all these guys around me who were extremely harsh and extremely mean towards my faith and my belief in Jesus. Some of the stuff they said to me, if I were to stand from the stage, I would have to get off the stage and it would probably make you blush. But there was this one guy in particular, who every single day, he would go out of his way to have a conversation with me, to engage in a conversation with me so he could tell me how wrong I was. And he could tell me how stupid I was for believing in Jesus. And I was extremely offended by this guy, let me tell you that I was extremely offended and he knew how mad he made me, and I knew how mad he made me. Until one day, one day we were in another conversation and like the word of God always does, I finally had him. It was check mate. It was game over. And in my mind, I was like: “All the times that you’ve come after me, all the times you’ve been mean to me, all the times that you’ve minimized my faith, I finally got you.” And it was in that moment that God humbled me in my spirit. And I remember when I was in this conversation, I looked at Cody and I asked the question: “So what do you think about what I said?”
And as he was searching for words, I could see in his eyes that they became extremely heavy and his posture kind of fell down. And the response that Cody would give to me made me realize how much time I had wasted the past year and how unloving I had actually been. So I asked Cody: “What do you think about what I said?” And as he finally gets his words, he looks at me. He said: “If God is so good, then why did my dad end up in a wheelchair and become blind?” I mean seriously. If God is so good, why did that happen? What did he do that was so wrong that God allowed that to happen in his life?
It was in that moment, the Holy Spirit spoke to me and he reminded me of a verse that I had heard before, but I did not yet understand. And this is the verse that he reminded me of. It was one Corinthians 13, one through three. It says:
“If I could speak all the languages of the earth and of the angels but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong, a clinging cymbal. If I had the gift of prophecy and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had faith, such faith that could move mountains but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. If I gave everything I had to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it. But if I didn’t love others, I would’ve gained nothing.”
1 Corinthians 13:1-3
It was in this moment, that for the very first time, I finally heard what Cody had said. Truth had been present, but love was absent the whole time. Don’t be proud, don’t be conceited. And so maybe you’re here today and you’re asking the question: “Why should we take responsibility for our life? Why is it important that we remember how merciful God has been to us when we don’t deserve it? Why should I be a living sacrifice? Why should I not be proud but be loving to others? What’s the reason for living an unoffended life?” And I want to encourage you with this:
Your life is too short. Your calling is too great to be offended by something too small.
Your life is too short. You’re calling too great to be offended by something too small. And the reality is the world is getting worse. We live in a very offensive world, and it’s only getting more offensive. And the reason it’s only getting more offensive is because now people can live behind the keyboard. Now people have platforms to be able to share and tell whenever they’re angry, whenever they’re bitter, whenever they’re hurt, whenever they want to offend and go out of their way. Now they have platforms to be able to say whatever they want, and they never have to tag their name to it and they never have to be seen.
We live in a very offensive world, but for that reason, we have to get a grip on our lives, not just because it’s the holiday season, but it’s because Satan wants you to live a wasted life. Satan wants you to be a victim of your circumstances. Satan doesn’t want you to overlook the offenses of others. Satan wants you to live a wasted life. But we are called to overlook the offenses of others. I love what Casey shared in Proverbs 19:11. It says:
“A person’s wisdom yields patience; and it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.”
Proverbs 19:11
We have to, by the power of Jesus in us, to overlook offenses. But the devil, he wants you to live the wasted life. And he wants you to be offended by everyone going and coming. But God says: “No, no, no, no. Life is too short. Your calling is too great to be offended by something too small.”
And maybe you’re asking the question: “So, Bunch, what’s the result of this? What do I gain from living the unoffended life? What is God going to grant me if I choose to live the unoffended life and not waste my life away?” Well, you get to live at peace with God, and you get to be at peace with others. That’s pretty good, right? You get to live at peace with God and be at peace with others. And I don’t know if you would agree this morning, but I believe our world is in deep need of some peace. Amen. And so this morning, I just want to invite you to bow your heads where you’re at. And first, I just want to talk to you, the Christian in the room. See, maybe today you would say that you’re without peace. You’re not walking around in a peaceful spirit. And it’s because someone has deeply hurt you. Maybe you’ve been talked down to, maybe you have allowed yourself to be a victim of your circumstances. Maybe someone made you feel small, they made you feel insignificant. Maybe they hurt you to your core and you’re walking around and you don’t have peace right now. But maybe today, you are ready to choose an unoffended life. You’re ready to get peace from Jesus who is our peace.
And so if you’re here this morning and you would say: “Bunch, I need some peace. I want to receive peace from God, and I want to be able to be at peace with others.” If you’re here this morning and you would say: “I just need some peace,” would you just raise your hand right now where you’re at? Just raise it real high. Just raise it real high. Thank you. Thank you. And so right now what I want to do is I just want to pray over you. I just want to pray over you that God would do a work in you. Because for as much as it depends on us, we’re going to live at peace with God and be at peace with others.
So Jesus, we come to you right now. God, and we bring situations and circumstances and people all to your feet right now, Jesus. And we acknowledge that God, our soul has been disrupted, that God we’ve been hurt, that God we’ve been betrayed, that God we’ve been made to feel small or insignificant. God, maybe we’re just here right now and we’ve just been offended by every little thing. But God, today we are asking that you would give us the power through your power alone, God, to be able to live the unoffended life so we can gain peace in this world. God, I pray for the person who’s just deeply hurting right now at God. God, would you just give them peace? Would you help them know that they have the power to choose a better life, a better calling? God, we give all of our situations to you this morning, and as you keep praying this morning, I want to acknowledge that there might be some people in the room this morning.
Maybe you haven’t made peace with God yet. Maybe you would say: “I don’t know where I’m going to spend all of the eternity.” Maybe you would say: “I don’t know if things are right with God, and I don’t know if I’ll go to heaven, but I would like to receive some goodness from God this morning, and I would like to make heaven my home, but I’m not sure how.” And I want you to know right away that there is no church that can save you. I want you to know that there is no amount of good deeds that you can do that can save you. There’s no six step plan or program that can save you. And there’s no church. There’s no pastor church membership or Christian parents that can save you.
So how are you saved? How do you make heaven your home? Well, Jesus said this in John chapter three, verse three. He says:
“Truly, I tell you, unless someone is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.”
John 3:3
And so the real question becomes, have you been born again? Have you been born again? And the good news is, if you haven’t been born again this morning, you can make that decision today. See, the thing I love about Jesus is: Jesus never complicated anything, but he made everything simple and accessible. And that’s why we say around here, being born again is as easy as A, B and C.
The letter A means to admit.
You just have to admit that you have sin in your life, that you have fallen short of God’s glory and that you can’t do it on your own. And I just want to give you some courage to admit right now, everyone has had sin in their life. Everyone has fallen short of God’s glory. And so you just have to admit.
The second letter, B means to believe.
It means that you have to believe that Jesus is who he says that he is, that he stepped out of heaven, came here to earth, he died on a cross on our behalf. And when he went to the grave three days later, he conquered death so that someday we can go home with him. So you have to believe that Jesus is who he says that he is.
The last letter, C means to confess.
You’ve got to confess Jesus as your Lord and as your savior, that you’re no longer in charge, but God is in charge and you’re giving him the reins of your life. And so if you’re here this morning and you would say: “I want to be born again.”
In a moment, in a moment, I’m just going to ask you to raise your hand and I’m going to ask you to keep your hands up. And I’m just going to go around the room and I’m going to count the hands around the room because I just want to make sure you’re included on the Born Again prayer. The Born Again prayer is a prayer that we pray together that seals the deal for us to make heaven our home. And so if you’re here this morning and you’re saying: “I want a fresh start,” If you’re here this morning and you’re saying: “I want to receive the forgiveness from God,” if you’re here this morning and you’re saying: “I want to have my name written down in the Book of Heaven,” if you’re here this morning and you would say: “I want to be born again,” would you just raise your hand right now? You just raise your hand. One, two, three, four, five.
Thank you. Now, I just want everyone to look up at the screen and we’re going to pray this prayer together, and I just want to encourage you, I think it’s such a good thing for us to pray this together because it’s a good reminder of what Jesus did for us a long time ago. But for those five who raised their hand, I want you to pay close attention to the words that you’re about to say. So let’s read it together, it says:
“Dear Lord Jesus, I believe you’re the son of God. I believe that on the cross, you took my sin, my shame, my guilt, and you died for it. You faced hell for me so I wouldn’t have to go. You rose from the dead to give me a place in heaven, a purpose on our earth and a relationship with your Father. Today, Lord Jesus, I turn from my sin to be born again. God is my Father. Jesus is my Savior. The Holy Spirit is my helper, and heaven is now my home. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
And amen. Can we give it up for those five?